church mouse

This past week or so has been so much better than the one before it. I've been able to maintain this strange new level of relaxation since the big storm, which has given me a lot of relief. I'm still mildly to extremely concerned about a few things, but not as tightly wound. I have made changes that seem to be sustainable. I've just been so worried about my health and so very sleep deprived that I've put fun on the back burner to some degree, but this week has reminded me to keep having fun. It's awesome and crucial to just let go and be happy when you can. Especially with an increasingly not terrible, but also not super pleasant job taking up so much of my time it's necessary to keep letting loose and not let the routine burn me out. The goal is health, happiness and productivity (or progression, or something like that) and none can wait for the others. I've felt a little more engaged lately, a little more in the world and a little less in my head.  And I've had a lot of fun.
This week has also been nice because without lots and lots of affection and physicality I wither, and I've had a nice few doses. From a dangerous source, but my favorite one. I don't think anyone else could begin to give me what I need right now. This could potentially become problematic, but for now it's ok.
So things feel pretty good at the moment (other than my stomach), I'm just keeping on and reaching for something.